Abraham is moved by the Lord to send his most senior servant, the controller of all his property, to procure a wife for Isaac, sending him 450 miles to Mesopotamia, where he would find relations, because Canaan was at that time a land of idolaters, and intermarriage with them was out of the question. Abraham’s family was truly a prefiguring of the Church in the world, as God had taught him.
The obvious lesson is that believers should marry within the family of God, and not into the world around, and this is explicitly required in 2 Corinthians 6:14-16, and also in 1 Corinthians 7:39.
It may seem strange to refer to this event for information on guidance in courtship, since Isaac had all the work done for him, but the inspired record presents to us a number of important counsels for courtship. Certainly, the narrative describes a most unusual way by which God provided a bride for a special person, through whose line the Saviour would in due course be born. Because unique procedures brought Isaac and Rebekah together, the passage does not tell us precisely how we are to go about things today, but abiding principles of courtship are clear to see.
If we belong to the Lord, we must desire the husband or wife of his appointment, believing that he has planned our lives and will guide. As we saw in the first chapter, the new, semi-rationalistic approach to guidance claims that we are free to make up our own minds in these great issues, because God does not have a specific partner for us, but Isaac’s case shows that the opposite is true, and it is the same for all believers who seek his leading and overruling.
Abraham trusts in the Lord, but he knows that he must not neglect to do what lies within his power. In a situation in which God has not revealed exactly how his will is going to come to pass, and yet he has promised to bless us, we may take reasonable steps, confident that God will bless our efforts in his mercy. In such circumstances trust does not cause us to wait and do nothing, but to pray and to do what lies within our power in conformity with his standards. Like Abraham we must advance, convinced that God is with us but not seeing how he will work and apparently left to act to the best of our own wisdom. Candlish says, ‘He has signs enough to direct him; and using his best endeavours to discover and ascertain what the Lord would have him to do, he may, without anxiety, commit to him all his way.’
Why is the servant to place his hand under Abraham’s thigh? The Hebrew is ‘thigh’, ‘loin’ or ‘side’. The placement of the hand under the thigh was obviously a ceremonial act in recognition of the solemnity of the oath. The Jews relate this act to circumcision. Gill thinks that it has respect to the promised Messiah who would spring from his thigh. Both of these views see here a discrete reference to the male organ. Others think that it was simply a sign of approaching in a humble servile manner (quoted by Gill). The same ceremony is required by Joseph of his father (Genesis 47:29).