Recognise you have a withered soul, with no life in it, no ability to relate to God. Unless you are healed, you will perish eternally. You can do nothing about it yourself. You must come to the only one who can help. You must come to the Saviour of the world as you would come to a physician, telling him all your symptoms and hiding nothing. You must make no excuses but let him see the full extent of your condition. You must repent of your sin and be willing for him to change you and become your Lord, having the right to command you how to act, speak and think.