Matthew 10:37 Commentary and Bible Study

These words are spoken to the disciples. Luke records Christ speaking similar but even stronger words to the multitudes (Luke 14:26-27). On that occasion he spoke these strange, shocking, and alarming sayings to rivet their attention. He did not want people as disciples who were coming in the wrong spirit. This was a danger because they had seen his miracles, and were looking for a political Messiah and people would follow him for the wrong reason. The expression sounds harsh, but it must be understood to indicate relative loyalty; Christ is not abrogating the fifth commandment. He therefore gives this caution: they must not set natural loyalties above loyalty to him. Here in Matthew, he says this to teach his disciples the great cost of discipleship, and the change they must expect to see in the lives of those who respond to their preaching. He is expounding Micah 7 quoted in the previous verse, and showing in what sense one family member will be against another. Of course when anyone is converted as a member of an unbelieving family, his greatest desire is that his family members should come to the same faith, and he tries his utmost through prayer and witness to point them to Christ. In his mercy God is pleased to bless these efforts in some cases, and we hear of whole families being converted, one after another. In that case, they are united in Christ and they will be of one mind in worshipping him. But what Micah describes is the situation when family members are not converted, and great pressure is put on the converted person to return to the old life. It is the family itself that makes this a choice between following Christ or remaining loyal to family values and traditions. In this sense, ‘He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me.’ Family loyalties and family affections are good and noble, but they must not be allowed to come in the way of obedience to Christ. This often shows itself in use of the Lord’s Day. For the new Christian it is a day for worship and fellowship with God’s people, a day of service to God, but for the family it is a day of relaxation and entertainment, and the family resents one family member absenting themselves from this.But Christ says that to give way to this pressure makes a person not worthy of him. Who but the Saviour of the world, the Son of God incarnate, could say such a thing? Who could make himself of greater importance than father, mother, son, or daughter? But this is a non-negotiable condition of discipleship, and it was intended to distinguish between those who follow Christ out of some inadequate motive, and those who have submitted to his Lordship and truly know him. Of course the Lord of Glory should hold a higher place in our hearts than those who, though they are kith and kin, are members of a fallen race in rebellion against God. He sets our love for him above every other allegiance. But to speak of worth is not to speak of merit. This condition is one that will be met by every true convert on account of the work of God’s grace within them. For him the world has been completely altered by the Spirit of God. His eyes have been opened and he has seen that Christ is his Lord by an eternal right, and his loyalty to the one who dwells within him by his Spirit transcends ordinary human relationships.