The expression ‘he that taketh not his cross, and followeth after me’ was one that Christ used on more than one occasion – in instructing the disciples concerning their mission here, in correcting the disciples attitude following Peter’s foolish reproof (Matthew 16:24), in warning the multitude about viewing discipleship too superficially (Luke 14:27), and in speaking to the rich young ruler (Mark 10:21). It was a concise summary of the Christian life, but what did it mean? Clearly it was a reference to Roman crucifixion, and the custom which required the victim to carry his cross to the place of execution.
We see Christ ahead of us bearing his cross, and we so much desire to be identified with him, that we are ready to be identified with his shame and suffering also, if that is what it costs. In the present context, that suffering involves being rejected by family. Is this too high a price to pay for discipleship? No, it is a small price to pay, for the glory of belonging to Christ. He has so ordained things that in this fallen world discipleship always has this price attached to it. ‘When tribulation or persecution ariseth because of the word’ (Matthew 13:21), the true disciple will not be offended. He expects to pay a price. Not that we can earn salvation by our suffering; it is always free and by grace. We do not present our sufferings to God and expect him to reward us for them. We simply regard this path to the cross as the necessary path we must walk if we wish to be with Christ. He was a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief. He set us a perfect example of how to live and what we should expect as his disciples.
This is not a standard for some disciples, but for all. Do we understand this? Some want to live comfortable lives even as believers, but there is nothing comfortable about bearing your cross to the place of execution. You have in effect renounced the world and all that it might give you. We do not deliberately court suffering, but neither do we avoid it if it comes for the sake of Christ. We prefer the shame of the cross and of discipleship to the honour of the world. The disciple is known by his willingness to bear that shame.
Did Christ by this metaphor tell his disciples in advance that he was going to be crucified? Certainly, when they looked back later on all his sayings, they would realise that he knew this. But it was later in his ministry that he spoke more openly of his death (Matthew 16:21), but even so, the disciples were slow to understand these things. It was not necessary for them to know at this time that Christ would literally be crucified in order to grasp the meaning of this saying.