Proverbs 17:18 Commentary and Bible Study

[See also 11:15] In an ostentatious act of largess intended to convey magnanimity to those watching, the hasty man makes a pledge which binds him in a way that he has not thought through properly. His focus is on the impression he will make by this act and he has not yet considered all that it will involve. But the contract needed in making this pledge is not going to release him from its hold and so this is portrayed as a thoughtless and unwise act. The word ‘friend’ can also be translated ‘neighbour’ and this is probably better because the proverb assumes there is no deep friendship between the two. This proverb does not offer any discouragement to real friendship for the previous proverb says the exact opposite. Real and costly friendship is something admirable. The problem with the relationship described here is that it is too casual and has been entered into without due consideration. Those who enter into casual and cheap friendships constantly do not reap the benefit of lasting and deep relationships. Friendship involves ties of loyalty, but why should we make ourselves loyal to those who are worthless, and who do not appreciate what we have done and will take advantage of our pledge of loyalty without paying back anything in return. Deep relationships are spoiled by this kind of shallow relationship. Young Christians who give time to everything dissipate their time as they fly around everywhere. This is illustrated by courtship: a butterfly has to settle down and lose other things because the wife he seeks is worth more than all the myriad of shallow things that have occupied him up till now. There is a pledge involved in making some friendships which is too costly. This one is chosen for their gregarious nature of their popularity. If we make friends with the wrong people, it is going to cost us what we should not be prepared to pay. That particular person or that particular prospective wife is going to draw us away from God and his standards, for it ought to be obvious from the start that they have tastes that conflict with the Lord’s. If we strike hands in friendship then we commit to follow through on that friendship, but we ought to see where we are going.